Wednesday, July 23, 2008

(Craziness Skyrocketing) Up Through The Atmopshere

So now we all agree - this has been pretty crazy, right? The sister-in-law, the colors, the brunch, the changing of the ceremony venue. Crap, I forgot to include that. Darn. Ok, I'll give you the quicky quick on that one. Because while in other Bride's stories of wedding planning drama this would probably play a starring role (see, e.g., any episode of "Whose Wedding is it Anyway"), in mine, this is but a bump down the aisle of matrimony.

I met with the wedding coordinator that the venue offers as part of their package. Essentially a very nice woman who I am fairly sure will be a giant mess on the day of my wedding (our relationship started off with an email introducing herself to me. It began: "Dear Phil and Katie, Congrats on selecting ____ as your wedding venue! I am so excited to work with you!" My name is not Katie. Mr F's is not Phil. But that's a whole other issue that I won't get in to here (somehow I suspect I will have much time to dissect and discuss the trials and tribulations of Big Hugs the wedding coordinator. Real name - not Hugs - but after pointing out that my name wasn't Katie, I got a response email saying "I'm sooooooooo sorry - I sent the wrong names! Big HUGS!" (Big hugs? You don't even know my name!)) So anyway, we'll leave Big Hugs for later.

I met with Big Hugs and we took a walk back around the venue as I told her my vision (which I don't really have, but all brides apparently have a "vision", so I made one up as I went along). And then she said to me: "Oh! I should totally take you to see the renovations of the ceremony room - they're almost done!!"

WHAT RENOVATIONS??????????

"Ohhhh...no one told you when you signed the contract?? They're changing around the ceremony room. Why don't we take a look?"

And we did. That's when I saw that the lovely green walls which were cool and classy had been replaced with a red and gold fabric and then marble floor had been covered with Oriental rugs and the altar was now covered in red carpeting. The serene and classy ceremony room I had agreed to walk down now looked like the World Market outlet. (OK, I know this sounds really silly, but I happen to hate the color red; it makes me inexplicably anxious. So the replacement of the green with the red was not good.)

Big Hugs leaned over and gave me an awkward hug. A big hug, in fact. And she told me that "It will be ok." Oh Big Hugs, how little you know.

And I know that this was supposed to be just an introduction to the big drama that is currently going on, but I'm spent; so, like everything in my life these days, I'll just postpone the update a little bit longer.

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